Why “Pick-Up Promises” Can Undermine the Camp Experience

It’s very common for parents to say before camp, “If you want to come home, we’ll pick you up.” We get it! This comes from a place of love. You want your child to know you are there for them. But in reality, this promise can make camp more difficult.

When kids believe they can leave whenever they want, they don’t fully settle in. We have seen this time and time again. Instead of working through the natural ups and downs of being away from home, like feeling homesick, adjusting to new routines, or figuring out how to live with bunkmates, they hold on to the idea of going home. That makes it harder to take the leap into camp life.

There is another piece to this too. If a child decides they want to go home and their parent doesn’t actually come, the child may feel tricked or let down. That can create feelings of mistrust that get in the way of all the positive growth camp has to offer.
The good news is that most kids do adjust, even if the first few days feel tough! Once they get into the rhythm of camp, homesickness usually fades. By the end, many campers can’t believe they ever wanted to cut their time short.

As camp professionals, we always have your child’s best interest at heart. We never want a camper to stay if they are truly miserable, and we will be in touch with you if we ever feel it has become a “pick-up worthy” situation. Our goal is for each camper to feel supported, cared for, and encouraged to grow through their time at camp.

As parents, one of the best gifts you can give is confidence. Tell your child you believe they are capable of having a great camp experience! Remind them it is possible to miss home and have fun at the same time! Trust the process, and trust your camper. More often than not, they will surprise you with just how much they can grow.

What to Say Instead

Here are a few phrases that set kids up for success without making a promise you might not be able to keep:

• “I know you can do this, and I believe in you.”
• “It’s normal to miss home and still have fun.”
• “The counselors and staff are there to help if you need support.”
• “I can’t wait to hear all about your adventures when camp is over.”
• “You are going to learn and grow so much.”

These messages help kids head to camp with confidence and the security of knowing you trust them to thrive.

Still have a nervous camper (or nervous yourself)? Reach out to our Assistant Director in charge of Community Care, Tori. We can set up a time to chat to work through it as a team! teast@urj.org